You’re trying to find a window in your scintillating social diary - no, can’t do Tuesday, that’s Tom – because you’ve met yet another member of the male species whose body beckons. Well, a particular part of his body. Funny, once you convinced men you thought romance irrelevant and dating dreary, you’re getting laid. A lot. Which is great. Grabbing hold of the sex sword without fear is the first rule of sexual prowess. The second rule is knowing when to let go of it. If you are hanging on for the bucks, the blow or just to hear somebody call you baby, maybe it’s time to dish the dirt on Ishtar the Mesopotamian Goddess of Love.
Ishtar was the It-girl of ancient Iraq, the babe of Babylonia. She was considered the ‘courtesan of the gods’ and the matron of prostitutes. In other words, she slept with whoever she damn well felt like. After a while, she ran out of lovers and thought she might see whose underwear she could remove in the underworld. She tried to blag her way in but the gatekeeper said (wait for it) 'your name's not on the list' and anyway, she could only enter if she removed an article of clothing at each of the seven gates …. by the seventh, Ishtar was completely naked and face to face with the Queen of the Dead. She complained about her treatment – 'don't you know who I am?' - and was promptly turned into a decaying slab of meat.
Don’t oversell yourself and end up way past your sell-by date like Ishtar. You don’t have to sleep with that many frogs to know that eventually all princes snore. A lively libido is lovely but it ain’t the be-all and end-all. Love yourself first, the sex will come. And if it don’t, just love yourself until you do. That’s what vibrators are for, doll. There are plenty of men in the sea... just don't spend all your time swimming in it or you may drown.
Mod Ishtar – Paris Hilton: hotel chain heiress with a serious over-exposure problem. She's tried jail, X-rated videos, pop music, reality tv, horror films, jewellery design and perfume creation but still can't seem to shake the scent of a spoiled rich girl who epitomizes our vacuous, sex-crazed celebrity culture. Now out of prison, Paris says she is no longer superficial, wants to work with sick children and has found God. No word on whether she's slept with him yet.
